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by Mimi Brickmeyer, staff writer  [October 4, 2018]




[]  A naked black man was seen lounging outside the Starbucks at the corner of Wilshire Blvd. and 26th Street in Santa Monica, California, at around 10:10 a.m. on the morning of Thursday, October 4th, 2018.

Panicked patrons inside the java joint called the attention of baristas to the Nubian nudist. Two baristas exited the high end coffee house to confront the au natural African, who was relaxing on a wrought iron chair (with tasteful antique finish) in the sidewalk seating area. Told he must depart or else police would be notified, the exposed gentleman left without incident.




From the cool comfort of the air-conditioned café's earth-toned safe space, coffee aficionados saw the nude's penis and balls dangling from between his legs as he left. However, his manhood was usually obscured by his tight derriere, which he occasionally jiggled for delighted clientele.

Fans began photographing and recording him from within the safety of Starbuck's soothing, womb-like atmosphere. A male barista pleaded with patrons not to phone the police, as the potentially explosive situation had been resolved in a satisfactory and peaceful manner.

Outside, a female barista was spraying the naked man's now empty chair with a cleaning substance, her other hand armed with paper towels.

It is unconfirmed whether the cleaner was of an "industrial strength" or merely "regular strength" variety.

Yet despite his departure, the bare-skinned brother didn't travel far. He was last seen standing on the northeast corner of Wilshire and 26th Street (across from Starbucks on the northwest corner), exhibiting his ample assets to passing motorists.

Whether he was on his way to work, or was enjoying his day off, remained unconfirmed at press time.


Mimi Brickmeyer is a Los Angeles based tabloid reporter specializing in celebrities and popular culture. Read about her adventures in Hollywood Witches!




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